Positive and negative

If we expect to find everything positive in a person, then we will never be satisfied with anyone, because more or less everyone has some weakness or shortcoming. But the weakness or the shortcoming of everyone is according to his level. And we must live with people despite their shortcomings. Otherwise, we must isolate ourselves in a house and we must lead our lives in isolation. Finally, we must realise that we also have shortcomings, we are not perfect. If we take that into consideration, it means that we should isolate ourselves from our own person which is impossible. That is why we must tolerate the shortcomings of others and lead our lives in the society. We try to benefit and enjoy the positive sides of our friend and refrain from his negative. According to a Hadith found in Saheeh Muslim, Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alaihi Wasallam) said:

"Woman has been created from a rib and will in no way be straightened for you. Thus, if one wants to take benefit from her, one will be able to take benefit despite crookedness remaining in her. But if one tries to straighten her, one will break her. And that breaking means giving her Talaaq."  

That is, we must have tolerance in life if we want to lead a good life. We must know how to ignore certain defects or shortcomings of our partner. We cannot be too meticulous or too much of a perfectionist in regards to others. Rather, this must be done to ourselves. Otherwise, our life will be difficult. But most of us do the opposite. That is, we are demanding towards others and tolerant towards ourselves. This applies to certain types of shortcomings because certain shortcomings and certain defects are also intolerable.

In another Hadith found in Saheeh Muslim, Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alaihi Wasallam) said:

"A Muslim should not feel disgust for another Muslim because if he hates something in him, he can be satisfied with another character that he has."

That is, a person must not hate his wife because no one is perfect. If she has an evil trait, she may have a character which is appreciable. Thus, he must try to overlook the negative side for the positive side. 

It seems that it is in the light of similar Hadith that the scholars of Hadith have established the principle according to which the Hadith of a controversial narrator is an acceptable and a valid Hadith. One should not hurry to reject a Hadith just because of the presence of a certain Rawi who was criticised by a group of scholars of Hadith. We must consider those who have accepted it as well. If we have the right to reject it due to criticism, we also have the right to accept it based on the approval that it received from others. This situation of a Rawi is qualified as مختلف فيه (controversial) by the scholars of Hadith. And according to the 'Ulama such as Az-Zahabi, Al-Munziri, Ibnul-Humaam, Ibn Hajar, Jalaluddeen As-Suyuti, a Hadith of such Rawi is qualified as Hadith Hassan. 

[English version of "Positif et négatif" – Al Jamiat – Vol.4 No.5]